Are you dubbed a ‘relationship disaster’?

Do people often make a running joke out of how much drama and action takes place when you go on a date? Is nothing ever straight forward? Are you struggling to get past the forth date/fourth week/fourth month point? Well if you feel like you’re not the most successful when it comes to meeting the right person… these are probably some reasons why…

Insecurity – You’ll most likely think the worst from the first date. You’ll analyze the hell out of a text/email or any form of pre date communication.  Even if there is nothing to think the worst about, you’ll think it.  You’ll see everything in a negative light rather than just accepting that maybe you’ve just met a nice person who actually genuinely likes you. If they genuinely show that they like you, the only person blind to this will be you. Insecurity is the catalyst of most relationship breakdowns and causes so many issues. Insecurity is like releasing a torpedo into the water.

Confusion much – It should NOT be complicado. Relationships are not easy but things should never be complicated to the point where you do not know where you stand. Effective communications is key to any type or relationship. Once you experience confusion, one party is not fully respecting the other. It takes two to tango and if you’re not tangoing in harmony like you’re life depends on it… then tango them out the front door!

Incompatibility – A relationship most likely will fail if there are no common interests. After the first few months, you may realise that you’ve nothing in common. You didn’t notice this before now because you were too busy and dazed in the honey moon period (0-6 months). When the relationship fails, you’ll immediately assume that he/she is just not that into you, you’ll think its something you’ve done and you’ll most likely rack your brains to try figure this out. You’ll think ‘ Oh it must have been that drunk dialing I was at last week?? Or maybe it was those cringe texts I sent??’ It’s not that. They would never have been into you in the first place because initially one is blinded by sexual attraction. If there are no common interests, then there is no relationship and no longevity. It’s similar to being long sighted.

 Instinct – Go with your gut, it never ever lies. Ever. Never ignore yourself, cause you’re always right! When you know you heading for a disaster, get out. Ski down that black slope to safety otherwise the avalanche will come to get ya! Or if they start telling you what to do, run a mile. Actually I take that back, run a Marathon!

So the moral of my story is that you’re not actually a relationship disaster, you’ve just not met the right person yet who appreciate and treats you the way you should be treated.

Personally I’d rather be Bridget Jones forever than have to sustain a farse of a relationship!



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Jenny Conlon is a broadcast, freelance journalist, writer and fashion and entertainment critic. Her work has featured on the RTÉ. fashion and entertainments website. She has assisted production of RTÉ's Morning Ireland and The Business. Jenny produced and presented a weekly fashion and entertainment show Girls Talk Back on 103.2 Dublin City Fm and was Newsreader and Editor of the newsroom. Her work continues to feature in Irish publications such as The Irish Tatler, U magazine and The Dubliner. Jenny completed her Masters in International Journalism in 2009. She is looking forward to a jam packed 2012 where she will continue broadcasting and writing and being inspired. She will be modelling for a high street fashion shoot and plans to climb Mount Kilimanjaro.....

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